She tried to distract herself. She talked. She listened. She even threw her most entertaining chuckle but her heart won’t let her rest. She tried again with different people, with different theme but the big thick cloud is still expanding and drizzling silently inside of her.
She closed her eyes. She tried meditating. Maybe she could ignore this one, probably soon it will go away.
Like always. Nobody has to know. No one likes a sad story and she had too much of them. She wished that she could bottle them all up and throw away everything to the ocean where she could set her soul free. Forgive them, she told herself.
She’s not sure if she could forget.
Focus. Inhale. Exhale. This too will soon pass.
But this is too much. Where should she do it this time? In the shower? Somebody would notice, doesn’t it being inside too long. She can’t do it in the room. There is another person there. Questions would be asked. Information would be dispersed and extracted. Rumors would be spread.
Why can’t she do it alone? Why is it so difficult to cry?
Maybe when the other person is fast asleep. That will do.
So she waited and waited and the time came. She didn’t dare to sob. It feels like a dam on the verge of breaking, she barely contained it all but the pain drips one tiny drop after one, endlessly and she couldn’t stop for hours until the dam was empty.
How would she look tomorrow? She was horrified just thinking about it. What will people think?
Stupidly, she cried some more.
Oh, what the hell. She probably will die like this too.
In the dark she saw a pair of eyes, yellow and blinking. Purring, he silently climbed onto the bed and sat on her pillow looking in her eyes.
Don’t look at me. Go to sleep.
She stroked his black fur and hopefully feel fine after this.
You wouldn’t understand.
He probably didn’t but he did a bold move. He came closer, kiss her face and lick her tears.
Must have been salty, she smiled. Oh, stop it! She started to giggle but still he couldn’t stop. He kissed her nose, her eyes, her face, her hands, the lot. He knew she was squeamish and ignored her protests to stop this nonsense this instant!
So this is your idea of consoling me?
Well, someone has to console her and he was there.
Thank God for furry little creatures!